Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Randomize
