I wanna bring you to show and tell
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
