she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
My vagina just clenched in fear
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