More tranny stories later!
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
sarcasm needs its own font
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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