i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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