I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
You should frame my arrest warrant.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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