How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
