so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
