I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
He has the fingertips of a God
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
