Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Nicole vs. Life
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
this is an emotional support booty call
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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