Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
