yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize
