So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
