Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize