You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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