Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I'm bleeding and have questions
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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