It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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