I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
