My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
