Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
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