i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
