he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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