porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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