so explain again why im purple
no
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
it glows. i had to have it.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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