OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
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