Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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