If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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