it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize