whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
