Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
