I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Never let your siblings swipe right.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
