I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
