so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I have aggressive nipples.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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