Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
as a side note pls kill me
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