scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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