So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
