You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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