I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
