I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize