Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
they need to just BURY HIM!
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Randomize
