everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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