Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
