think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
