he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
