Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
now i know why i became what i already was.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
