it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
he's gonorrhea incarnate
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
