I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize