i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
