I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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