I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
It's never too late to be topless.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
